Monday, June 05, 2006

Gay Marriage Horror

Neal Boortz sums it up:

THAT BUSH .. HE'S REALLY IN TOUCH, ISN'T HE?
I had yet another sleepless night last night. It was awful. I woke up at about 1:30 and just couldn't get back to sleep again. You'll hear me yawning uncontrollably today on the show. Not good radio, but whatchagonnado?
And what kept me awake? Well ... I'm sure you're like me. At night, when the mind is otherwise cleared of the flotsam and jetsam of everyday life, those problems that really count, I mean those just awful and terrible problems you have, will come visiting ---- with a vengeance. So last night I'm lying there when suddenly I'm shocked by the realization that somewhere, perhaps even within a ten-mile radius of my home, my sanctuary, there might be two men or two women who truly love each other lying in their own bed as they sleep. Then ... this horrible thought. What if they wanted to get married? Well .. that was it for me. I should have just gone ahead and gotten up to start the day about four hours early. I spent the rest of the night worrying about the devastating impact on my own marriage and on my career that would surely follow if two gays or two lesbians were actually allowed to engage in some ceremony to show their love and lifetime devotion to one another. Why, I'm just not sure I could go on! What would be the purpose in life if two homosexuals were actually allowed to make that kind of commitment to each other?
Fortunately, help is on the way. Today we're going to have a big time presidential speech from the Rose Garden at 1:00. Frankly, I'm surprised they didn't plant a garden of pansies just for this incredible event. President Bush is going to set all of our minds at ease by coming out strongly for some sort of a Constitutional Amendment to ban gay marriage. We've needed this for such a long time. I think that it is perfectly fitting for us to use the United States Constitution, a document that is dedicated to the preservation of our inalienable rights, to tell a certain specific group of people what they cannot do, rather than tell the government what it cannot do.
We don't need tax reform. We don't need an end to earmark pork spending in Congress. We don't need smaller government and school choice. We don't need real reform that would put medical care back into the competitive marketplace. We need none of those things. All is fine! What we need is a Constitutional Amendment that will keep two people who love each other, but who we don't consider to be normal -- not by our standards anyway -- to marry.

I know I'll sleep better tonight.

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